it's 5 o'clock in the morning.

okay. but not really.

it's only 11:26 PM. and i'm rather drunk. i'd rather be sleeping.

i think relationships are garbage. i had a friend recently delete me from FB. this friend, getting legitimately engaged to this guy after knowing him after a month. A MONTH! how insane is that? this is something i cannot get on board with. i made this distaste known, and we haven't been the same. i found out a couple days ago, she deleted me as a friend. my only concern, is that if something happens, how can i be there to support her? i've been told that it is her decision, and all that. but i still feel bad for how it has ended.

the reason why this ties in to my disregard for relationships, is because i feel this degrades the sanction of marriage or even just engagement. i know i want my engagement and marriage to mean something, but with the apparent trend of getting engaged and/or marriage at such a young age, i feel it ruins it. it ruins the magic that i've been attributing to it for years.

ever since i was about 8 years old, i've been envisioning this big prince charming coming to sweep me off my feet. now, over the years i've edited and revised what i consider prince chrming, but i still would love it if he comes to sweep me off my feet. but i don't want to get engaged, or promised to someone, within the first few months of knowing them. i think that is so completely ridiculous.

i don't know what i'm talking about. i can't read what i've written, as i'm not wearing my glasses. i hope it makes sense. i'd just rather take my time, than commit quickly. it sucks, but i'd rather that, than get into a ridiculous relationship.

more in the morning. i swear,